| The Strength of a Three-Fold Cord - Final Sophomore Musings |

"And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him - a threefold cord is not quickly broken." - Ecclesiastes 4:12, ESV.

I am constantly surprised by how quickly time flies.  Regardless of the time of year, it slips by faster than I would like it to.  And this past school year was no exception.  So, although this post may seem a bit late (being nearly a month since school ended), it just doesn't seem like it has been that long since school ended.  

This year needed some time to digest.

Side Note: I think summer is an integral part of college.  For some, summer is an escape, or a time to make money, or a time to just recover and relax.  I think summer can be all of the above and more.  Because time is so hard-hitting and fast during the school year, it is very easy to let many of the lessons that you learn outside of the classroom slip through the cracks.  School has a way of "trimming away the fat."  And this is where summer comes into play.  Summer should be the time to reflect and rebuild.  To look at the lessons that you might have forgotten about, or just brushed away during the rush of school, and do your best to analyze and apply them.  

As I was saying. . .

I could point to many things that I learned this past year, but that would require a much longer blog post and I think that would cause the few readers of my blog to become glassy eyed and stare off into the horizon. (I wouldn't blame them.) 

But what would I say is the lesson that I took away from this year?

Friendship.  That is what has been impressed upon me.

Friendships are where you apply your learning.  That is my practicum if you will.  I've realized that what we learn in the classroom is put into practice in our friendships.  

New Saint Andrews College has been a furnace where some of my greatest friendships have been forged.  It has been a phenomenal blessing in many ways, but this year - this last school year - has impressed upon my life many friends that I can count on and trust.  

Since having moved around a-lot with the military, I have discovered that that can accelerate friendships in a way that seems abnormal.  But looking back, I find that it is the shared experience that really drives those friendships.  It is the pressure of moving, having a father deployed, or being in a brand new place that brings you closer to someone else.

At New Saint Andrews, I have found a similar kind of pressure.  The friendships that I have grown in have been forged in the furnace of intensive learning.  It is a kind of learning that pushes and challenges you in a way that is far beyond mental.  You have to have the desire and determination to really understand it, and also the push to put into practice what you have been taught. 

I remember one Finals Week quite vividly.  I walked into Friendship Square to find a fellow student earnestly preparing for an oral final that he had in under half an hour. The look on his face reflected what I must have had on mine.  Stress.  Both of us were visibly concerned about our perspective finals, yet in that moment I had light a bulb go off.  This is exactly what we signed up for.  

To be challenged.  

And it is in these kinds of moments where friendships are tested.  It is in these kinds of moments that the strength of our three-fold cord is challenged.

It is by no means a cake walk.  

This past year, I have truly been able to witness and experience how iron sharpens iron.  And I cannot wait to see what next year has in store as we continue to grow and push one another in our faith, studies, and lives.  

This is the close of another chapter of my schooling, but it is the beginning of many things that I cannot begin to comprehend at the moment.

Further up and further in!

| Talking Trees |

“Speak!”

“No.”  They laughed.

I swung my stick.  “Speak.  I’m listening!”

“No!”  They cried in unison.

“I’m here.  I want to know.  Your stories are bursting at the seams. . . let me in!”

“You aren’t ready.”  They repeated.

“You keep saying that!  Stop saying that.”

“You aren’t ready.”

“Why do you say that?  Talk.  I’m a son of Adam; speak to me!  Tell me your stories.  I have so much to learn!  Let me in.”

Silence.

I stopped mid-swing.

A whispering.

I relaxed, the stick hung limp in my hand.

The whispering grew louder and louder.  I took a step back and looked up at them.  It swelled to a roar.  The ground started shaking.  Then, it all fell quiet.  And, when I say quiet, it was an oppressive silence.  A silence that was so loud, I wanted to plug my ears.

But I remained where I stood, rooted to the spot.

Call it courage, fear, stubbornness or awe,I don’t know which, but I do know that I stood.

Then.

Nothing.

Then.

A blast.

Life hit me like a semi-truck.  Stories, scenes, and lines acted out.  The trees were talking, and I was completely prostrate on my back.  The teeming life that I had been sensing earlier swept over me, stealing my consciousness with it.  My world was getting rocked.

Laughter in the wind.

Growth in the rain.

Joy in the sun.

Pain in the lightening.

Anger in the axe.

Weeping in the fall.

The swelling ebbed and flowed and then something began to happen.  Subtly, the unified roar slipped into different voices.  Originally, it had just been one voice.  The original voice had told me its' story, its' trial, its' joy, but other voices had to speak.  And they did. 

It was overwhelming.

Seeds.

Roots.

Time passing.

Bark cracking.

Limbs stretching.

Rings widening.

Glorious life.

Age.

Wisdom.

Peace.

Fire.

Saplings young.

Life consumed.

Trees felled.

Hope lost.

It went on.  Lives were lived, history was, and the present was gifting.  Then it stopped.

And I lay there.  Broken.  A fool.

I asked.

And there was an answer.

There were answers.

And I wasn’t ready.

The Cowardice of Sarcasm

Sarcasm is a big part of who I am.

I was raised in a sarcastic family. 

It is just part of the culture I grew up in.

And I really appreciate that, because we live in a very sarcastic world, which is full of very sarcastic beings.  So, it was a training of sorts to be able to hold my own in playful banters and also know when someone else is being sarcastic.  It definitely serves its purpose.

But, there is always a flip-side.

I've noticed that I have a tendency to use sarcasm as a crutch, instead of a tool to lighten conversation and the mood.  There is a very calloused way to use sarcasm, and I think I've used it for that intent too many times.  It is pretty easy to just fall behind sarcasm and use it as a shield.  There are days that I may not have gotten much sleep the night before, or I'm stressed out, or maybe just emotionally drained, and my fall back is sarcasm.  Why do I do it?   Because it is safe.  It is easy to just whip it out and throw it at any interaction, and think that everything is good.  And since I do use it in a very playful tone most times, it is easy to disguise my actual meaning with sarcasm.

Which it is actually just cowardice.

If I'm not willing to say what I mean, then I shouldn't make it difficult for people to catch my drift.  That is how miscommunication happens.  Sure, it is easy, but it isn't right.  Obviously, this is all still a work in progress, because I am still pretty sarcastic, but the first step toward fixing a problem is identifying it, right?

10 Things That College Students Do

August is coming to a close, and we're pushing for the end of our third week of school.  I seem to constantly marvel at how fast time seems to fly.  It seems no matter how much I try to walk the tight rope of balancing life, I end up falling off on one side or the other.  Maybe I'll get into the swing of things by the end of the semester...  All that being said, I've found that there are tendencies and habits that you develop, especially at school. Here are ten of them:

1.  What's food?

As crazy as it may sound, it is pretty easy to forget to eat.  You'd think that this is something that I would never forget.  Yeah, so did I.  Atleast before college was a thing.

2.  When you think that three books of Augustine is an average night of reading.

Apparently, this isn't normal?

3.  Consuming coffee as though there is no tomorrow.

Before coming to school, I never considered myself a coffee drinker, but I would now qualify myself as one.

4.  Sleep becomes an after-thought.

I don't think that I would fall into this category, but I know plenty of classmates that think that sleep is not nearly as important as Herodotus.  (I'm not naming names though.)

5.  The only thing that keeps us from missing a class is death itself.

(Well, atleast some of us.  Some of us identify more closely with Ferris Bueller than other people.)

6.  Late night grocery trips.

Late night grocery trips can be exciting, right?  ("Adventure is out there!")

7.  Listing the nearest coffee shop as your place of  residence.

(Maybe not this drastic, but it is basically the same.)

8.  Barbecues and free food is our jam.

If you want to make friends with college students, serve free food.

9.  Counting study groups as a your weekly social gathering.

It is sad, but during exam week, that is just about the only socializing you'll be able to do without feeling guilty about it.

10.  Feeling guilty about not doing school work, even if you're sleeping.

This is true for your first year.  But then after that, you realize that sleep was given to us for a reason.

Sophmoronic Musings: Finding the Right Value to Survival

Last year, I roomed with three fellow freshmen.  Needless to say, we were all very excited about the upcoming school year.  We all got along very well and it didn't take people very long to give the four of us a nickname.  (Granted, showing up in matching outfits for the first day of class didn't exactly help that.)  But I distinctly remember us sitting down on day one, to make sure that we didn't form a clique.  We didn't really want to be known as that group of guys.  

And so, we made the effort to seek out other people in our class and be more intentional about hanging out with our fellow freshmen. But, something funny ended up happening about three weeks in.  Instead of hanging out with each other for fear that we would come across as a very exclusive group, we careened into the other ditch to the point where I felt like I hadn't gotten to know any of my roommates at all.  (We had decided to do this for a number of reasons, but I think that the biggest reason was that we had all experienced both sides of the coin.  We had known that invincible feeling of being included, and also felt that insufficient feeling of being excluded.)  But after last year, I think I might have found the middle ground.  I think the initial thought of trying not to exclude people was good, but what happened after that may have been worse than our initial proposition.  

Over these last couple of years, I have found that I really enjoy connecting with people and finding out about their story.  I like building solid friendships.  But I think I deceived myself into thinking that I was an extrovert at the beginning of last year, because I was so excited for this stage of my life to begin.  Then reality kicked in, and I just seemed to hit a social wall.  By fall break, my energy levels hit an all time low.  That is when I started to come to the conclusion that I would need a core group of friends.  

I guess I'm an ambiavert, but I've noticed that when I go to big parties, I gravitate toward smaller groups.  I find that when there is a large group conversation, it is hard to actually get to know someone despite being apart of the same group for three hours.  Don't get me wrong, I think there is a time and place for large class parties, but there isn't much time allotted for catching up with or getting to know a person at these gatherings.  

This and many other things brought my attention to the fact that having a group of friends that you can rely on, seek advice from, and rest with when life hits you hard, is very important.  I count myself a very wealthy man indeed with the friendships that have been forged over the last year or so.  Obviously, there is a balance.  And sometimes, you'll find a great group of friends, and then not want to meet other people, because it is uncomfortable.  I totally understand that.  I think I fall into that trap more often than not. But it is something I'm working on.  Lewis put it very well when he said: "Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art, it has no survival value.  Rather it is one of those things which gives value to survival." 

Here is to finding the right value to survival.

Ignore Us - An Open Letter to NSA Freshmen -

Here we are.  On the eve of orientation week for the incoming New Saint Andrews freshmen.  The class of 2021 are warming up for the next four year marathon, and since I have two of them for roommates, I decided that I should write this to dis-spell a few rumors that I have heard circulating.

You're sitting there, probably battling nerves, excitement, terror.  Whichever emotion that is dominating the scene, I assure you, everyone has experienced all of the above.  I remember exactly what I was thinking.  There was alot of second guessing in my mind.  It was a constant pendulum:  I am so pumped!  This is exactly where I'm supposed to be, and it feels so good.  And then the very next minute:  What am I doing?  I think I'm going insane or am already insane.

As you've rolled into town over the last few days, I'm sure you've met some of my classmates.  Maybe even including myself.  I'm almost sorry.  I know that I've enjoyed throwing out little bits of information that no one needs to know.  Whether that be horror stories of how tough a class is, how intimidating declamations are, or even a few tall tales of finals week.  I was just speaking with a few of my classmates (who shall remain unnamed), who told me gleefully of how it is quite fun not being a freshman, and how that they have enjoyed telling them stories of the coming year.

Anyway, all this to say.  Don't pay us any mind.  We're just one year ahead of you.  Just one step up. The only difference is that we just finished freshman year, and I think we're alittle drunk on our own success.  This term should sober us a little bit.  But, for the majority of the time, keep in mind that the sophomores are just blowing smoke.

 You're stepping out into a very different scene, and it will obviously take time to adjust.  But the whole process makes the end feeling taste that much sweeter!  Some of you may find your groove right out of the gates, but others may (like me) take a whole term to adjust.  It was a mental uphill battle, but it was worth it in the end.  Jerusalem term is filled with parties, icecream socials, rugby, and barbecues.  It is a blast!  Everything is brand new, but don't be intimidated by that!

I'm looking forward to meeting all of you.

Once again, ignore the sophomores.

Sincerely,

A sophomoron.